Be the Change

Three quotes have been dancing around in my head today.  “Be the change you want to see in the world.” is credited to Ghandi, although I’ve read that quote is more of a summary than what he actually said.  Carl Jung said, “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”  And Eckhardt Tolle said, “Anything that you resent and strongly react to in another is also in you.”  I think these three men were sort of saying the same thing in different ways.

When my spouse has been tempted to engage with an inconsiderate driver, I have often told him not to engage with crazy.  If someone cuts you off in traffic, why escalate a bad situation?  It is something that bothers me.  Who knows if one time the person getting the evil eye and a shaking fist may be a crazy person with a gun.  I have come to realize I am just as guilty of engaging crazy.  I’ve largely disengaged from social media because when someone posts something stupid or untrue, I feel the need to call it out.  When I have done that, I felt justified in my actions.  Stupid should be pointed out as stupid!  Untruths shared publicly should be called out! What could be wrong with pointing out false information and pointing them to documentation proving what is true?

Calling out something stupid as stupid, or pointing out misinformation seems like the right thing to do.  While it may not be wrong, it is not productive.  Engaging with crazy only gives power to the crazy.  Attention only feeds it.  People who promote lies will not suddenly see the light because I provide them documentation.  The upset feeling at seeing printed lies does not diminish because I point it out; it only increases my angst.  Maharishi Mahesh Yogi said, “Whatever we put our attention on will grow stronger in our life.”  When I engage with crazy, my focus on it only increases the crazy in my life.  It doesn’t feel good to feel that angst.  That angst feels like poison.  So why should I poison myself?  Poisoning oneself would be crazy.

Instead of engaging crazy, I try to be the change I want to see in the world.  It is unlikely my words or pointing out the truth will change the mind of someone so vested enough in a lie they post the lie on social media.  Instead I practice peace, love, and kindness in my world.  I think of what I can do for others and what actions cause me to feel peace; then practice that.  It is a practice.  Still craziness can pull me in.  When it does, I recognize it and remind myself to instead find a way to manifest peace and love.  It is a practice like meditation.  In meditating one puts attention on their breath; in and out.  Before long the mind wanders from the breath and thinks about work, something someone said, and a myriad of other things.  Then the meditator recognizes the mind has wandered then returns focus to the breath.  

Recognizing having once again been pulled toward craziness again, I return to the practice of peace. What can be done to be the change I want to see in the world?  I imagine what can be done to spread peace and love; then do that.